Star crossed lovers

My anti-blogging days are over, for now at least.

Oakland is oceanless. I knew this going into it. But at this point, ocean and I are star crossed lovers. She and I love one another very much, but sometimes love is just not enough. See, in the midst of ocean and my (open) relationship, I started seeing this guy named school. School and I kind of hit it off, but for a while I was able to balance the two. I would visit ocean for morning tea, hang out with school during the day, and then reunite with ocean for a good long surf at sunset.

Unfortunately all good things come to an end. School and my relationship became more and more committed and I had a very tough decision to make. Move to Oakland with school or stay in Santa Cruz with ocean. School is so foxy and intellectual that I just couldn't resist. Besides, I think I had come to take ocean for granted and told myself some space would be good for the two of us. So I packed up my clothes and skateboards and bicycle and books and rode off into the sunset with school.

And for a while everything was great. School satisfied me and I was able to push ocean out of mind. The weeks went by, and school and my relationship started to get hard. He just got so needy and demanding, both of which are not very sexy. At the same time, ocean kept popping into my head. Even when I was in bed with school I imagined it was ocean. I finally couldn't take it anymore, so I told school I'd be gone for the weekend and snuck off to visit ocean.

The whole weekend was gut wrenching! The moment I saw ocean all of her beauty flooded back to me and we reunited with a glorious surf session with a peak all to myself. Being together again was euphoric, and of course school never even crossed my mind. Knowing our time together was so short became torturous. One morning we were together and all I could think about was my impending departure. She didn't make it any easier either, what being so fluid and free and embracing and all. She kept teasing me to break up with school and come back to her. I wanted to so bad.

Sometimes it's hard to remember the big picture. Ocean is like cheesecake. School is like an orange. Both are sweet, and in the short term cheesecake tastes so good. But oranges are better for you in long run. Besides, there will always be cheesecake in the world in case school and I ever part ways.

Sunday came, and gathered up the courage to get in my car and go back to school. I drove up Highway 1 though, just so ocean and I could spend a few last moments together. She gave me heavenly waves at Sand Dollar in Big Sur as a going away mindfuck.


Now I am back with school, in the little room we share. We spend our nights reading Foucault and Gramsci, and sometimes school surprises me with little knowledge presents. We're working things out for the time being. But ocean will always have my heart, which is why we are having an affair. School doesn't know, but on the weekends I escape back into oceans arms and we talk about a day when we will be reunited. School doesn't deserve this, but what's a girl to do?